Here come the Rooney-weds : Wayne and Coleen married at last

So there you have it, Wayne and Coleen are finally hitched. Mr and Mrs Rooney wed at 9.30am this morning in a civil ceremony on the Italian Riviera. Bit of a mean start time seen as most guests had been up till 5am the night before getting tanked at a masked ball on an 80 megabillion pound yacht, but what can you do.

So the wedding itself. A half hour quickie. In, out, no mucking about. Coleen struggled up the runway dragging a 25 foot train and wept as the £50,000 wedding band was finally fitted on her finger. Wayne swayed, didn't say much, got on with the job in hand. (Still mullared?) Thank heavens it wasn't a long drawn out church job.

The wedding gaggle then took off to a nearby million pound monastery for a champagne breakfast and a firework display, (to spurt dramatically out of the sea below.) Who knew fireworks work during the day. Quick break after brekkie, then disco boots on and time to cut a rug on the dancefloor to Westlife, and an unnamed but very expensive rapper Wayne had ferried in for the occasion. Oh and lots more guzzling of very posh plonk. How to celebrate their first official day as man and wife tomorrow? A barby on the lawn - not a frozen Iceland frankfurter or garage forecourt proposal in sight. Those kids have come along way.

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