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Don't call it a comeback

Tiger Woods has announced that he will be returning to golf in the most dramatic way possible, at this years’ Masters at the Augusta National, the place where he won his first major tournament 13 years ago. The Tiger is trying to get people talking about his golf swing again, rather than that what’s swinging between his legs, and he will no doubt have to run a gauntlet of bad golf/sex-related punnery from the likes of Peter Allis (and us).

Tiger has already won The Masters four times, and he considers it a special place in his professional life, so he will be teeing off on 8 April and hoping to bag his 15th Major title.

‘Although I'm returning to competition, I still have a lot of work to do in my personal life,’ said the man himself. ‘When I finally got into a position to think about competitive golf again, it became apparent to me that the Masters would be the earliest I could play.

‘I called both Joe Lewis and Arnold Palmer and expressed my regrets for not attending the Tavistock Cup and the Arnold Palmer Invitational. I again want to thank them both for their support and their understanding. Those are fantastic tournaments and I look forward to competing in them again.’

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